February 2, 2014
Super Bowl Sunday. Last year this day meant a free-for-all with my mother-in-laws homemade tacos, Spanish rice and all the junk food in sight. Those days are gone. Those days have been replaced with my new life.....eating clean.
Today was the first "obstacle day" since I began this new life on January 1st, 2014. Today was the first time I was around the bad stuff with people who ate a lot of the bad stuff. Don't get me wrong, the bad stuff is fun and yummy sometimes. However, I have learned something very important about myself in the past 33 days. I can't do just a little bit of the bad and yummy stuff. If I have one potato chip with onion dip, then I might as well have a bowl of chips with a side bowl of onion dip.
My husband, whom I love with every morsel of my being, is a bit like me. He has been eating very carefully and exercising very diligently for almost 2 1/2 years. He had learned all the stuff about himself and his habits long before it was my turn. He knows his downfalls and he knows the mind games we play with ourselves. Today was a "day off" for him and he had planned on it for a week knowing he would need the bad and yummy stuff to enjoy his 2nd Christmas, Super Bowl.
My boys, bless their sweet bad and yummy loving selves, love going to their Nana and Papa's house as they know it means lots of bad and yummy. 13 and 9 and not at all caring about what they eat....as young boys should.
I prepared for my day with volunteering to make an eating clean turkey chili recipe. I figured if I made it and I was the only one to eat it, oh well, it helped me and I looked good in the eyes of my in-laws. I prepared fresh vegies and fruits and made a homemade eating clean banana bread last night. I made myself a batch of green tea and took pistachio nuts in case I needed something else. It was also a birthday celebration day so cake and ice cream were going to be in the mix.
I did really well! I did amazingly well!! I never considered digging into the bag of Ruffles and plunging into the onion dip. I saw the brownies and chocolate chip cookies and I looked away. The Taki's looked at me and I snubbed them. The cake and ice cream pouted as I did not care about them. I did really well and it felt really good.
I have learned something important about myself. I can do this eating clean thing and not defeat myself. I can succeed at this and not look back at myself in a month and feel like a failure. I can do this because I never, ever want to return to my old ways. I am finally clean from head to toe. I only have clean in my pantry, fridge and drawers. I have taken so much time and effort to get to this point. I do not want to dirty myself by taking steps backward. I am a clean slate and all of my old transgressions are not visible. I feel good. I can see where I was and I can see that I was defeated by food. I can see where I want to be and I am excited
I want to blog this stuff so that I can see my progress. This is not for anyone else but me. The new me will want to see how this all began.
No comments:
Post a Comment